Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.