Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.

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  (845): I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick. http://tfl.nu/cye7
  Replies (9) Good night (4095) Bad night (712)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.

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  (631): Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life. http://tfl.nu/pg4a
  Replies (2) Good night (1023) Bad night (3043)
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  (949): View more from California

  I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.

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  (949): I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying. http://tfl.nu/ychl
  Replies (4) Good night (1167) Bad night (1642)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.

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  (203): I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday. http://tfl.nu/3knu
  Replies (12) Good night (1335) Bad night (4066)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.

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  (678): I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life. http://tfl.nu/5bor
  Replies (17) Good night (4694) Bad night (961)
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  (562): View more from California

  I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.

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  (562): I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex. http://tfl.nu/ik0l
  Replies (15) Good night (5726) Bad night (1168)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?

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  (610): Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar? http://tfl.nu/upld
  Replies (9) Good night (1016) Bad night (2982)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  we didnt even have break up sex...

  (1-816): View more from Missouri

  you had it for us with someone else...

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  (816): we didnt even have break up sex... (1-816): you had it for us with someone else... http://tfl.nu/e06z
  Replies (18) Good night (1985) Bad night (6733)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.

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  (843): I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes. http://tfl.nu/lhf2
  Replies (28) Good night (1193) Bad night (4194)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.

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  (808): Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful. http://tfl.nu/6ueo
  Replies (10) Good night (2475) Bad night (944)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.

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  (251): I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer. http://tfl.nu/4bxr
  Replies (14) Good night (2267) Bad night (974)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.

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  (334): You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk. (205): Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner. http://tfl.nu/j3pe
  Replies (5) Good night (1994) Bad night (556)
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  (714): View more from California

  Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.

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  (714): Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym. http://tfl.nu/t6kc
  Replies (5) Good night (1066) Bad night (678)
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  (527): View more from

  I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.

  (1-527): View more from

  Top night. Top night.

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  (527): I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered. (1-527): Top night. Top night. http://tfl.nu/68t6
  Replies (1) Good night (482) Bad night (610)
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  (235): View more from

  if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?

  (366): View more from

  except your soul

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  (235): if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right? (366): except your soul http://tfl.nu/vptx
  Replies (1) Good night (505) Bad night (623)

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