yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
