Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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