No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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