just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize