WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
the day after is always just damage control
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
