I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
soo... how was my night?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
