Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He keeps bees of course he's weird
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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