Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
