Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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