Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
