i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
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I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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