either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
