Buhtt sex?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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