he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
