Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
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