I don't usually arrange sex via text message
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize