the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize