i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
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he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
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Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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