we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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