Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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