Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
