So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize