they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
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Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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