I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
