bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
