I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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