went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
