Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
