Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
