why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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