i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Enjoy the penises
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize