with your own penis?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
