Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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