I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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