I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
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i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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