So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
