Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
