so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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