none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
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