One girl and one boy is just not enough.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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