Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize