They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize