who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
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