He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize