Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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