Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
