Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize