no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
