You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
